A question of faith: Letters Reveal Mother Teresa Questioned the Existence of God

By Sinclere Lee

Chattanooga (BNW) —
Why does God let bad things happen to good people, while the wicked of the world get away with murder? Either God can stop it, but won’t, or He wants to stop it but can’t. This is the question that destroyed Mother Teresa's faith in God and religion, and my faith in God and religion, as well.

Apparently, I am not the only person struggling with this dilemma; Mother Teresa had problems with it too. In life, she was the archetype for believers of God's work on Earth. She ministered to the poor of Calcutta was a world-renowned symbol of religious compassion. As a result, she was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, and now on the fast track to sainthood.

Mother Teresa had a calling, she told CBS News in a rare interview, based on unquestioned faith.

"They are all children of God, loved and created by the same heart of God."

But now, it emerges that Mother Teresa was so doubtful of her own faith that she feared she was being a hypocrite, reports CBS News correspondent Mark Phillips. In a new book that compiles letters she wrote to friends, superiors and confessors, her doubts are obvious.

Shortly after beginning work in Calcutta's slums, the spirit leaves her and she questions the very existence of God.

"Where is my faith?" she writes. "Even deep down … there is nothing but emptiness and darkness. ... If there be God — please forgive me," she writes. A decade later, she's still looking for the belief she's lost. My faith is lost too! How can a merciful and just God bless America? … When, America is one of the most evil nations in the history of the world. Yeah, we all say, “God Blass America.” We all say that this country was built on Christian values. Both are dirty lies! This country was not built on Christian values; it was built on slavery. Certainly, a just God would not bless a wicked country built on such wickedness.

"Such deep longing for God," she writes. "… repulsed, empty, no faith, no love, no zeal." This woman was tormented by the hypocrisy of her faith.

As her fame increased, her faith refused to return. Her smile, she says, is a mask. I ware a mask in America when I see all these lying people claiming to love God, but their action reveal that they serve the devil.

"What do I labor for?" she asks. "If there be no God, there can be no soul. If there be no soul then, Jesus, You also are not true."

"These are letters that were kept in the archbishop's house," says the Rev. Brian Kolodiejchuk.

Rev. Kolodiejchuk, the priest who’s making the case to the Vatican for Mother Teresa’s proposed sainthood, gathered the letters. He says her obvious spiritual torment actually helps her cause.

When she state in her letters that if there is no God, there was no soul, and the belief in Jesus was useless. I state that the wickedness of the world brought on by the by greed and the lack of social justice will send the fake Christian in America straight to hell.

"Now we have this new understanding, this new window into her interior life, and for me this seems to be the most heroic," says Rev. Kolodiejchuk.

According to her letters, Mother Teresa died with her doubts. She had even stopped praying, she once said.

The church decided to keep her letters, even though one of her dying wishes was that they be destroyed. Perhaps now we know why. Do I fell vindicated by Mother Teresa’s letters? Yes! Do thing America is on its way to Hell? Yes! Is there a way for America? No! And, the Blacks in this country who are playing the same game as these wicked whites in this country, you are on your way to Hell too.

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